"A-NI-ta . . ."

OK, I don't want to drag out the "5 worst christmas songs" discussion again, but I recently came across the worst Christmas recording ever. It's an Anita O'Day and Jack Sheldon live rendition of "The Christmas Waltz" (which is actually a really nice Christmas song when you hear a version other than this one). The song itself is pretty weak, with syrupy, overdone vocals and a fairly staid backup line, but it is the corny and rather offensive banter that occupies the last QUARTER of the track that distinguishes it. A selection, transcribed by me:

"A-NI-ta, can I have this dance?"

"I don't know. Only if you're a good boy, Jack."

"Remember last Christmas?"

"Heh heh. (yes, people "heh heh"!). I sure do."

"We danced together till the wee hours."

"And I told you to be a good boy then, too."

"I was, I was! Don't you remember the next day (comment deleted to preserve innocent minds and spare you a really bad joke)?"

. . .

"Anita, you are my sugar."


*retches in disgust*

Just imagine, somebody recorded this and actually put it onto a compilation of great Christmas jazz . . . I've almost come to agree with John Sinclair about the state of the music industry.


I sang with the school choir in a multi-choir Christmas concert this evening. Contrary to frantic, last-minute expectations, we performed respectably, although we were rather overshadowed by the massive choir of largely British adults that our school music director runs on the side. In conjunction with the decidedly British cast of the evening, they served mulled wine and mince pies during intermission. Mince pie (which I hadn't tasted before this evening) could be renamed fruitcake pie with some accuracy, I have decided.

Top 5 Christmas stories:

5. A Bum's Christmas - H.L. Mencken
4. Mr. K*A*P*L*A*N and the Magi - Leo Rosten
3. The Kid Hangs up his Stocking - Jacob Riis
2. A Christmas Memory - Truman Capote
1. A Child's Christmas in Wales - Dylan Thomas


Merrily yours,

Sam